A Child Waiting | a poem

by j.kiley

I am writing from the past
To be read in the future
It is time to tell my story
To let my self open
Free to say it out loud

Too much to say
To write on this page
I am okay beginning
Telling my psyche-confessor
Finding the words to speak

Words the silence kept locked up
Hiding in the clouds
Soaring with the crows in silence
Unable to feel . no touching
It will lock me up

Have worked years to follow the maze
Guiding my child to a freeing
The feelings will begin their release
If it happens . when it happens
It will be surprising

It may last but a moment
Before their voices force me
The abusers . the thieves
They cursed my desire
Alone with them in the darkness

Innocent sensations tainted
Destructors abuse lives
Haunting the hallways
Waiting to get back in
They do sometimes

Time to unlock the secrets
A gentle directness is essential
A demanding necessity
Recovering who I am
The one holding the first memory

In the dark being raped sexual
Now they wait at the door
It seems they will always be there
Waiting for another turn
Finding their way back in

© j.kiley ‘17
Free verse